What are the main areas we need to focus on as parents?

A. Setting Priorities:

We need God’s wisdom and guidance in making our priorities in order. Creating a checklist will help you determine which areas of priorities need attention.

Five things that we as individual parent must value:

1.Prayer time and reading and discussion of Scriptures

This area should not be neglected. It is the very foundation of our life in building our faith in God (Romans 10:17). Abiding and dwelling in Him consistently is the key to be fruitful in everything we do. For without Him being involved in our lives, we can’t do anything (John 15:5) Acquiring knowledge is very helpful but without God’s wisdom, knowledge acquired will not be effective.
- Psalm 127:1 “Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain.”
- Psalm 128 “ Happy is everyone who fears the Lord, who walks in His ways. You shall eat the fruit of the labor of your hands; you shall be happy, and it shall go well with you. Your wife will be like a fruitful vine within your house; your children will be like olive shoots around your table. Thus shall the man be blessed who fears the Lord.”


Recommended activities as a parent:

* set specific family prayer time
* teach children how to pray the rosary; give them rosaries as gifts; buy tape with recitation of the rosary (for young children who cannot read); play the rosary while iin the car; let the children lead the rosary
* buy religious books for children
*introduce saints and angels


2. Family
Our spouse and children should be the next priority in our life. They are the people whom we will be spending the rest of our life with so there is a need to build a stable , loving and healthy relationship with them. “A family that loves (agape) and prays together; stays harmoniously together.”

Recommended activities:

* eating together
* one-on-one discussion
* social gatherings
*attend school activities

3. Health
There is a need to care for one self. Physically, mentally, emotionally, psychologically and spiritually fit. Otherwise impairment will affect your family. Avoiding having too much stress such as worrying. Having enough rest and well-balanced meals and exercise. (1 Cor. 3:16) Caring for self is not selfishness but rather an act of love. How can you love others, when you don’t know how to love and care for your wellness and wholeness? (Luke 10:27) You’ll never get around much if you have a poor health and be able to enjoy life to the fullest, which is God’s abundant gift and promise to His children.


Recommended activities:

* play together
* exercise together
* healthy cooking and eating
* get regular medical and dental check-up

4. Work
The time spent at work should not hinder the time spent with the family and care for our health. Our professional role is temporary. When we retire we will be replaced, but our role in the family will never end. Family is the only truly permanent role in life. No person in his deathbed would say," I wish I spent more time in the office."

Recommended activities:

* plan overtime or avoid overtime


5. Social
Finding a group or a community that gives Christian support and help is a blessing. Friends can reassure us in times of doubt and can help us in times of trouble. We need one another and we also learn from each other. We have the right to choose our friends. Choose wisely.


B. Time Management:

We need to learn how to have a balance in our life to avoid burn out and neglect of responsibilities. Managing your time wisely can determine balance in all areas of priorities.

Example:
What happens when you spend more time at work and less at home?
Result: A messy household, unhappy spouse and restless children.
What happens to a father who spends 8 hours watching TV and 5 minutes with his child?
Result: A child loses his father. (The Simpson, Bart not respecting his father.)


The Life of Jesus also showed importance to family:

a. He spent 30 yrs with hidden family life with Joseph and Mary, trained and worked with Joseph as a Carpenter. It is through close relationship with His parents that Jesus learned and formed His values.
- Luke 2: 51- 52
b. He spent 3 yrs. of public life.
- Dedicated His life in serving others through preaching, teaching, healing. And one thing He never neglected to do is to draw Himself close to the Father. He had set His priorities in order. He had time to be himself with the Father, with His mother and with His close friends.
- Jesus’ first miracle happened in a family.

c. He spent 3 hrs - suffered, crucified and died for our sake that we would be restored back in the family of God as His adopted children.
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Part 2. Three Graces we must ask from the Lord:

1. Courage to accept our own imperfection.
- We are imperfect. Recognizing that we too can make mistakes.
- Be able to accept our own limitations.
- Awareness of our imperfection will make it easy for us to ask forgiveness from our children. Not accepting one’s weaknesses and imperfection will make it difficult to ask forgiveness and to be humble. Unforgiveness creates a wall between parents and children.

2. Humility to change ourselves first.
- This is the first rule in family therapy. “If we wish our children to change, we should learn to change first.”
- A child will not be encouraged to change if they see that their own parents refuse to change.
- Changes come from admitting and accepting our faults and failings.
- Changes begin first on the inside, before changes happen around us.

3. The joy of parenthood.
- Being a parent is a privilege, not a burden.
- Parenting is a mission. This should not be a cause of our misery. God entrusts our children to us. They are not ours to keep but we are steward who should take care and nourish them with love and affection until the age that they can stand on their own.
- Children are a blessing. It is a great privilege to be around them and learn from them. They got so much to teach us. Learn to treasure them because at the end they too will value your efforts and love for them. What you sow is what you will reap.
-Avoid comparisons. Children are created unique individual. No one is the same as the other even identical twins.
Let us pray to the Lord that we become joyful as parents.

Psalm 127:3; 128:3
Proverbs 22:6
Proverbs 17:6; 22:6